AD | Self love, sex appeal and body confidence during pregnancy
Sex appeal in pregnancy is very touch and go.
I’ve already spoken a couple of times about how hard it can be to learn to love your pregnancy body, how difficult it can be to find your feet with pregnancy style and how to battle body confidence issues in pregnancy.
Your body changes constantly during pregnancy. That’s a given and there’s absolutely nothing you can do about that. As difficult as it may be, the best you can do is try to accept – even better, embrace! – the changes and your new body.
Self love and body confidence is something I talk about all the time, regardless of whether you’re pregnant or not. Sex appeal is something I disucss a little less…
Well, no time like the present, hey?
Sex appeal in pregnancy
Sex during pregnancy is a tricky subject to navigate. Pregnancy does different things to different people. Some people get a heightened libido, other women can’t stand to be touched and are even completely repulsed by their partner!
There is no ‘right’ or ‘wrong’, no ‘normal’.
In a similar vein, peoples sex appeal and body confidence can come and go in waves. This is totally normal during pregnancy. With an ever changing body and crazy raging hormones, how you feel about yourself is bound to change as often as your physical body does.
Whilst some people feel glowing and gorgeous in pregnancy, others feel completely uncomfortabe in their new body.
This can have an affect on many areas of your life, not least your sex life.
You might want to have a sexual relationship with your partner, but how you feel about your body might be preventing that. You might feel unattractive and undesirable – and if you feel that way about yourself. chances are you probably believe that’s how your partner sees you. Insecurities can dampen your sex appeal, body confidence and sex life.
Let me help you; I’ve put together some tips on how you can boost your sex appeal and body confidence throughout pregnancy.
Ready? Then dive on in!
Treat yourself to some new lingerie
Lingerie always makes you feel good about yourself, right?!
Who doesn’t feel like a complete sex icon in some good fitting, sexy underwear?
If you’ve never really gone big when it comes to underwear before and have only stuck to basic bra and pants, why not use this time to play around with different styles? Find what suits you, what feels good and, better still, what makes you feel sexy. Nothing will boost your sex appeal like some good underwear!
As a bigger girl, finding sexy lingerie can be tricky – not helped by the fact that lingerie is almost always modelled on conventionally attractive, slim women. You know, Victoria Secret angel style.
Tutti Rouge Lingerie* aren’t a brand I’d heard of before, but a few weeks ago they reached out to me and asked if I’d like to try some of their pieces, I was intrigued. A quick browse of their website and social platforms told me that they were a brand for the “fuller bust girls”. I was sold.
Your boobs grow at a pretty quick rate when pregnant – not helpful if you already had pretty sizeable boobs. Pretty little lacy bras and big boobs rarely go hand in hand, but there’s an incredible selection at Tutti Rouge. The quality is of a high standard, there’s lots of gorgeous designs in all shapes and styles – really, there’s something for everyone, even pregnant women!
Have a confidence boosting photo shoot
Want to know what’s a massive confidence booster? Taking a good selfie and getting alllll the compliments for it.
Seriously, there is so much power in a photo of yourself that you love.
Maternity photo shoots are popular, usually of the parents to be looking blissfully happy. Slightly less popular are photo shoots of mum-to-be on her own. Less popular than that? Sexy photoshoots of mums-to-be.
Maybe you pay for a proper shoot, maybe you don’t. Paying for a ‘proper’ shoot means you’ll have a photographer who knows how to capture you looking your best. But it can be expensive, or even uncomfortable if your confidence isn’t at it’s best.
You can do it yourself, with ease! We’re living in generation selfie. Doll yourself up. Put on a face full of makeup and an outfit that makes you feel good. Head to the bedroom or bathroom, check the lighting, snap some selfies and capture that sex appeal!
If you’re feeling confident enough, why not snap some cheeky lingerie pics to send to your other half? It adds a bit of spice to both your days, and can be a taste of what’s to come in the bedroom later… (literally, lol).
Whether you post a smiley selfie on the ‘gram or send a sexy selfie to your partner, either way you’re bound to get a compliment or two – and those compliments are going to boost your confidence. Especially compliments from your partner!
Create a confidence boosting, sex appeal oozing playlist
Music has the power to evoke incredibly strong emotions in people. If you’re looking for a quick and easy confidence booster, look no further than a bold, sassy playlist full of confidence enhancing songs. The same can be said for boosting sex appeal – who’s going to make you feel sexier than Beyonce singing about being a naughty girl, or Rihanna singing about chains and whips?
When you’ve found this playlist – or made your own – blast it out as loud as possible. Sing along, have a dance or just sit and take in the lyrics.
If you’re looking for some suggestions, here are some of my personal favourites:
- Soulmate – Lizzo
- Love Myself – Hailee Steinfeld
- Good As Hell – Lizzo
- Don’t Feel Like Crying – Sigrid
- Let ‘Em Say – Lizzo and Caroline Smith
- I’m Every Woman – Chaka Khan
- Me & U – Cassie
- WOW – Zara Larsson
- Dangerous Woman – Ariana Grande
- Anaconda – Nicki Minaj
- Snack – Ms Banks and Kida Kudz
- Good For You – Selena Gomez
- Sex With Me – Rihanna
- P*$$Y Fairy (OTW) – Jhene Aiko
And that is just a small sample to get you started! Different lyrics make people feel different ways – the lyrics to these songs make me feel confident, sassy, powerful, sexy. Find songs that do that for you.
Listen to them over and over, when you’re feeling sad or low or in need of a confidence boost.
Lizzo in particular is guaranteed to make you feel good, no matter what!
Don’t compare yourself to sexy celebrities
Thanks to social media, we get to see all the ins and outs of the lives of celebrities. When they get pregnant, they all seem to look glamorous and gorgeous, utter sex icons even whilst heavily pregnant. Sometimes, this can leave us wondering what we’re doing wrong, why we don’t look that good.
Don’t compare yourself to celebrities!
I mean, you shouldn’t ever do this anyway, but you definitely shouldn’t when pregnant. I touched on this briefly in the post about pregnancy style, but we always seem to forget these celebs have stylists on hand. A whole glam squad, doing their hair and makeup and choosing their clothes.
Also, don’t forget that social media is a highlight reel. You see a photo of them looking dolled up, but they’re probably like most pregnant people – in comfies most of the time!
As I say all the time, whether I’m talking about self love or body confidence or whatever, curate your feed for you. Only follow people who make you feel good about yourself, and if that means unfollowing or muting some people, even if just for the duration of your pregnancy, then do so!
Feeling good is key – especially at a time in your life when you can end up feeling so fragile.
Practice a little self love
I don’t just mean the previous ways I’ve discussed about practicing self love, with positive affirmations and self care etc. Nope, I mean the more… physical self love.
Oh, let’s not tiptoe around it – masturbation!
As a society, we openly accept that men can masturbate and it’s totally normal and fine. What about women?!
Masturbation has so many benefits – it helps you to get in touch with your body. It allows you to learn what you like and what feels good, it can be a great stress reliever and releases endorphins that make you feel good.
Better still, it can make you feel sexy. Making yourself orgasm can make you feel confident and powerful, and these feelings can very easily transition to the bedroom.
Use toys, watch porn, do it in the bed or the shower… there are various options to explore and you should! Even whilst pregnant, there’s nothing to stop you having a bit of me time and loving on yourself.
Even if you feel sexy and confident one day, you might not the next. Like any feeling in life, it can come and go. That’s okay – it’s just life! You have to take the good days with the bad and embrace them all. But hopefully this post has given you some inspiration to boost your sex appeal and body confidence whilst pregnant, particularly on a bad day.
If you find that during pregnancy, you don’t feel sexy at all, that’s fine too! There’s more to life than being sexy, and if for nine months of your life it’s just not happening, don’t force it. There’s plenty of time afterwards to get your mojo back, so don’t let it get you down too much.
And hey – no matter what you look like, your partner who loves you endlessly is gonna find your bloody gorgeous no matter what!
I hope you’ve found this post useful – if you have any tips of your own, feel free to share them below. You never know who you might help!
The items in this post were kindly gifted to me by Tutti Rouge Lingerie as part of a brand collaboration.
Love from, Florence Grace